Is this the moment that I am waiting for?!?!?! or just a dream???!!!!
When my sister asked me if I want to work abroad, i told her that I am interested but make sure that my job is not as a call center agent.... I am not against about that job but I just dont like it... Anyway, after the pageant (mr gay philippines), I realize that it is really time for me to settle down when I know to myself that I found the guy that im also waiting for...
This time I asked myself... Is this just a trial or a joke?!?!? Is this really what God want for me??!!Why does he needs to do that, now that He knows that I love this guy...What I am talking about is when I finally met the guy and at the same time career abroad knocks to my door and asked me if I want to travel and work as a Visual Merchandiser.
When I finally received the news that I am FIT TO WORK... I cried and think of the things that I will gonna miss when I leave the country... Although its really hard for me to decide, but then I chose to work my papers and process it and leave the country as soon as I can.... So that no more heartache, no more homesick and no more relationship that will grow and develop... but then ... its not really easy... It is not really easy when you know that you are already attached to a person that changed your life, your style, your future and your beliefs...It is wonderful to think that I feel this feeling again...It is a great feeling when you know that someone love you and vise versa....
According to my sister, I might leave the country on or before 12th of May and now, I only have few more days to spend it to my family, friends and to him... Because I really want some quality time with him and I want to enjoy the moment of us being together ...
We plan,
We talk
We think
and
We will Sacrifice...
These are the things that we do... Thou soon we will sacrfice being together but we hope it will be for our future life being together... I also asked my sister if it is ok if she work out on my loveone's papers, so that we can both go there and work and save some $$ so that after 2 years or so..we can return and start a good business of our own, built a good family and have a great home....
Isnt it wonderful that this time you are not thinking of urself anymore but instead you are dreaming and wishing to have a best life with someone you love in the near future... I must admit im madly inlove and i think loving someone is also consider as a BALANCE of everything...There is one time when my conscience told me... "having a relationship is not just giving your heart, your time and your effort.... also you need to live! you need to work and you need to earn and live for your future..." which is totally true... I want to live life with enjoyment... not just sorrow but of course we need to work for us to live...
BUt there is sometime when It think..."Is he my boyfriend now??" "When is that?!?!" I hope that its real.... I know he loves me...and he knows I love him but I just dont know and feel when he will be mine... I just dont know when will I able to call him MY boyfriend... MY partner...???I dont know...Cause this time i dont want to initiate... I just want to hear him telling that I am his boyfriend....
Its just like... I dont want other people thinking that Im just claiming if I introduce him to our common friends as my boyfriend... I just dont like the idea of " I KNOW HE IS MY BOYFRIEND.." but what if other people asked him...and answered..."we're just friends..." It is hard to accept?!?!? right?! I know I am not that good in terms of relationship coz I know to myself that most of my relationships are totally failed and not a good thing to remember....
I know that life is cruel...
I know that life is a struggle
I know that life is full of sacrifice
I know that life is painful...
But when you face these and when you feel these... You know that you love... because when you overcome those trials by improving how much u love the person... It means that you know u've been into a very hard time.. but then... no regrets because you know u gain something and you learn something from it...
I LOVE YOU.. u know that... i just dont want it that way... I also want u to feel that...
I might not be perfect but willing to learn
I might look not serious but i also want to talk more stuff
I always listen and im happy you talk
I also want to talk and share... but i hope you are listening and understanding...
Dubai, UAE is kinda far from the Philippines and it will take 2 years after I come back... I told him that he has the time... he has everything and I will make sure that when I return... I still going to love him and I will prepare for our futre together ... I hope he will feel the same thing...
All I Ask is to ...
LOVE ME...
This time I asked myself... Is this just a trial or a joke?!?!? Is this really what God want for me??!!Why does he needs to do that, now that He knows that I love this guy...What I am talking about is when I finally met the guy and at the same time career abroad knocks to my door and asked me if I want to travel and work as a Visual Merchandiser.
When I finally received the news that I am FIT TO WORK... I cried and think of the things that I will gonna miss when I leave the country... Although its really hard for me to decide, but then I chose to work my papers and process it and leave the country as soon as I can.... So that no more heartache, no more homesick and no more relationship that will grow and develop... but then ... its not really easy... It is not really easy when you know that you are already attached to a person that changed your life, your style, your future and your beliefs...It is wonderful to think that I feel this feeling again...It is a great feeling when you know that someone love you and vise versa....
According to my sister, I might leave the country on or before 12th of May and now, I only have few more days to spend it to my family, friends and to him... Because I really want some quality time with him and I want to enjoy the moment of us being together ...
We plan,
We talk
We think
and
We will Sacrifice...
These are the things that we do... Thou soon we will sacrfice being together but we hope it will be for our future life being together... I also asked my sister if it is ok if she work out on my loveone's papers, so that we can both go there and work and save some $$ so that after 2 years or so..we can return and start a good business of our own, built a good family and have a great home....
Isnt it wonderful that this time you are not thinking of urself anymore but instead you are dreaming and wishing to have a best life with someone you love in the near future... I must admit im madly inlove and i think loving someone is also consider as a BALANCE of everything...There is one time when my conscience told me... "having a relationship is not just giving your heart, your time and your effort.... also you need to live! you need to work and you need to earn and live for your future..." which is totally true... I want to live life with enjoyment... not just sorrow but of course we need to work for us to live...
BUt there is sometime when It think..."Is he my boyfriend now??" "When is that?!?!" I hope that its real.... I know he loves me...and he knows I love him but I just dont know and feel when he will be mine... I just dont know when will I able to call him MY boyfriend... MY partner...???I dont know...Cause this time i dont want to initiate... I just want to hear him telling that I am his boyfriend....
Its just like... I dont want other people thinking that Im just claiming if I introduce him to our common friends as my boyfriend... I just dont like the idea of " I KNOW HE IS MY BOYFRIEND.." but what if other people asked him...and answered..."we're just friends..." It is hard to accept?!?!? right?! I know I am not that good in terms of relationship coz I know to myself that most of my relationships are totally failed and not a good thing to remember....
I know that life is cruel...
I know that life is a struggle
I know that life is full of sacrifice
I know that life is painful...
But when you face these and when you feel these... You know that you love... because when you overcome those trials by improving how much u love the person... It means that you know u've been into a very hard time.. but then... no regrets because you know u gain something and you learn something from it...
I LOVE YOU.. u know that... i just dont want it that way... I also want u to feel that...
I might not be perfect but willing to learn
I might look not serious but i also want to talk more stuff
I always listen and im happy you talk
I also want to talk and share... but i hope you are listening and understanding...
Dubai, UAE is kinda far from the Philippines and it will take 2 years after I come back... I told him that he has the time... he has everything and I will make sure that when I return... I still going to love him and I will prepare for our futre together ... I hope he will feel the same thing...
All I Ask is to ...
LOVE ME...
