I remember the boy.... but he dont remember the feelings!!!

this past few days i feel so sad, and i dont know the reason why... but then it made me realize that im alone and wondering who will be the guy that will love me for real??? We feel so sad especially when we realize that someone from the past reminds your present... right?!

LAst year, i saw and meet my ex boyfriend and i feel so sad because i thought he's trying to figure out our relationship... i also thought that he's working out our relationship and his feelings towards me... because he keeps blaming me of what happen during that time....I never thought that that will be the last moment we remembered that we LOVED each other..

Well then, i cant blame him because of what happen from the past. But that day in the middle of the dancefloor, i saw him happy and thats one good thing for me to move on... but why the ghost of my past keeps telling me to remember those relationship... I just feel so sad... i dont know why I experience this feeling once again... I know that i dont have any reason to get jelous with him because we're no longer lovers but then... i feel so sad... is it me ...??? or him?? i just dont know...

i just want to write this story in order for me to file and document and then im sure that later on, i will forgot that i met him... i really feel so sad...


.... A few minutes ago, i typed and visited my another ex-boyfriend's friendster and saw that he improve more and much goodlooking than before and it made me realize that maybe i miss going out and miss working out... Well i think that this is the best time for me to move and to go on and start a new lifestyle...

I think that this is one good motivation for me to go to gym and balance my time, my diet and my savings in order for me to be well and able to cope up with different stress stuff that comes to my life...

but if that what im really looking for ??? Hmmm...

No matter happen, i feel so lonely and thats what bothers me... Sometimes, i really like to have someone next to me... to cuddle, to love and to be love by me... but then... When he will come and stay? when he will come and say he love me? when he will come and say "i will be ur forever", when he will come and say " even we're not that good partners, im sure everything will be ok"

I wish he come and tell me those things because, im sure that when i hear that, i will feel fine and brave enough to face my life...